Woo! Two posts in two consecutive days!
A song has been on my mind lately. It's called "You Can Have Me" by Sidewalk Prophets. The first verse goes like this:
If I saw You on the street
And You said, "Come and follow me"
But I had to give up everything
All I once held dear and all of my dreams
Would I love You enough to let go?
Or would my love run dry
When You asked for my life?
The first time I heard this song, I had a moment of guilt. I thought about it and came to the conclusion that, if asked to follow, I would say something along the lines of, "Are you crazy? Why would I give up everything I love and have worked for to follow this strange man?" and of the ones who might already be following, I would probably assume they didn't have much of a family or belongings since they had decided to follow this man.
Why do I decide to do this now then? I'm not entirely sure. I know I've had moments of doubt and question, which I'm continually told, are actually good for my faith life. These questions show that I'm really considering what's true and real and that I care what I believe. And I'm glad that I have them.
I don't have an answer to why I "wouldn't" have followed then and why I do now. I'm skeptical of unknown situations, not one to gamble. The time it would've mattered the most, I would've gambled with my life. But not I know right answer and I am glad to be a follower.
Friday, December 31, 2010
Thursday, December 30, 2010
More Than Anything
I don't actually have that much to say. Nothing profound or planned out, which as far as the planning goes, I usually like to do to some extent. I don't want to sit here and ramble which contributes to the small number of posts I suppose!
Something that has been on mind, not just recently, but everyday for the last... maybe 9 years, is that everyday is special and not to be taken for granted. Since fifth grade, when my dad had cancer, I have realized that everyday should be used to its greatest potential. I made sure to say, "I love you" and I really meant it each time. Two years later, when my aunt passed away from a brain tumor, my realization was only reaffirmed.
Now, having lost a good friend last February, I can't take a day for granted. I say, "I love you" to people and mean it. Every time I leave the house while I'm home from college, I am sure to say it. Each phone call to my family and some friends, ends in: "I love you". Every hug, every word, means something.
This might freak some people out, but when I hug the people I care about the most (since it might be a bit much if it were everyone,) I literally try to memorize the moment... just in case it is the last.
I've experienced a time when I didn't say "I love you" to a family member who ended up passing away and it hurt for quite some time. I didn't think to say goodbye the last time I saw them because I thought I would see them again, as usual. That didn't happen. I've accepted that they were well aware of it before hand and that it's okay that those words hadn't been said. But I know what they mean now more than anything.
Don't be afraid to tell people what they mean. And don't waste your time being angry! If that's one thing that's changed in me, it's this: when arguements arise or conflicts come up, I only let them have limited control over me. I have realized how much I used to let anger control me. I could allow an arguement to last a week, and words could hurt me more than anything; but now, I know that I can have my moment of being upset, realize it's not worth the time wasted, which I could be using to show my love instead, and get over it. No, I don't instantly brush everything off, and there are things that can get me down for a long time, but I don't let it control me.
And I encourage others to make that same choice, too... :)
Something that has been on mind, not just recently, but everyday for the last... maybe 9 years, is that everyday is special and not to be taken for granted. Since fifth grade, when my dad had cancer, I have realized that everyday should be used to its greatest potential. I made sure to say, "I love you" and I really meant it each time. Two years later, when my aunt passed away from a brain tumor, my realization was only reaffirmed.
Now, having lost a good friend last February, I can't take a day for granted. I say, "I love you" to people and mean it. Every time I leave the house while I'm home from college, I am sure to say it. Each phone call to my family and some friends, ends in: "I love you". Every hug, every word, means something.
This might freak some people out, but when I hug the people I care about the most (since it might be a bit much if it were everyone,) I literally try to memorize the moment... just in case it is the last.
I've experienced a time when I didn't say "I love you" to a family member who ended up passing away and it hurt for quite some time. I didn't think to say goodbye the last time I saw them because I thought I would see them again, as usual. That didn't happen. I've accepted that they were well aware of it before hand and that it's okay that those words hadn't been said. But I know what they mean now more than anything.
Don't be afraid to tell people what they mean. And don't waste your time being angry! If that's one thing that's changed in me, it's this: when arguements arise or conflicts come up, I only let them have limited control over me. I have realized how much I used to let anger control me. I could allow an arguement to last a week, and words could hurt me more than anything; but now, I know that I can have my moment of being upset, realize it's not worth the time wasted, which I could be using to show my love instead, and get over it. No, I don't instantly brush everything off, and there are things that can get me down for a long time, but I don't let it control me.
And I encourage others to make that same choice, too... :)
Monday, December 20, 2010
Empty Handed
Ever been the one who doesn't receive the gift during a gift exchange?
For a few hours, I was that person. I will admit I was disappointed at first, and it was only over a simple scarf exchange. Besides that fact, I got the missing gift within 24 hours. It wasn't a huge disappointment, but one none the less. I also came home to see my sister be the one without an expected gift. My mom had repeatedly asked her what she'd received from her dance company gift exchange but my sister wouldn't answer. Once mom was gone she told me that she actually hadn't received one because her 'giver' wasn't there. I knew how she'd felt, and I knew it wasn't the greatest feeling.
Thinking about this, I realized: At least it's Christmas, we ALL get a gift. God sent Jesus as a gift to us all! It seems to simple, but means so much. And I know that sometimes it's hard to see that in the midst of being left out; but this year, if I should again end up gift-less, I will remember that I have been given the greatest gift of all... forgiveness, and that journey to the cross all started with a baby in Bethlehem.
For a few hours, I was that person. I will admit I was disappointed at first, and it was only over a simple scarf exchange. Besides that fact, I got the missing gift within 24 hours. It wasn't a huge disappointment, but one none the less. I also came home to see my sister be the one without an expected gift. My mom had repeatedly asked her what she'd received from her dance company gift exchange but my sister wouldn't answer. Once mom was gone she told me that she actually hadn't received one because her 'giver' wasn't there. I knew how she'd felt, and I knew it wasn't the greatest feeling.
Thinking about this, I realized: At least it's Christmas, we ALL get a gift. God sent Jesus as a gift to us all! It seems to simple, but means so much. And I know that sometimes it's hard to see that in the midst of being left out; but this year, if I should again end up gift-less, I will remember that I have been given the greatest gift of all... forgiveness, and that journey to the cross all started with a baby in Bethlehem.
Tuesday, December 14, 2010
It Is Finished...
28 Later, knowing that everything had now been finished, and so that Scripture would be fulfilled, Jesus said, “I am thirsty.” 29 A jar of wine vinegar was there, so they soaked a sponge in it, put the sponge on a stalk of the hyssop plant, and lifted it to Jesus’ lips. 30 When he had received the drink, Jesus said, “It is finished.” With that, he bowed his head and gave up his spirit.
-John 19:28-30
For some reason this verse has been put on my mind with the ending of the semester and the finishing of finals. I notice the relief felt in students, including myself, when that last paper or test is complete. It's a great feeling. But why is it so great? What caused us to want that end? Could it have been the stress each class had caused us at some point? Maybe the fact that when it's all said and done, we get to relax?
This brings to mind the words of Christ, "It is finished."
Christ felt that stress and probably wanted things to end. He was sent to die for us, and it makes me wonder what He felt like knowing that He would soon give up His spirit after such a grueling battle to the cross. He remained perfect and didn't complain (like we do about our homework and quizzes).
This realization doesn't take away my relief from a semester ended; but it does make me appreciate it. I can't begin to imagine what Christ felt like when he was finished with His task. It makes our seem so small.
-John 19:28-30
For some reason this verse has been put on my mind with the ending of the semester and the finishing of finals. I notice the relief felt in students, including myself, when that last paper or test is complete. It's a great feeling. But why is it so great? What caused us to want that end? Could it have been the stress each class had caused us at some point? Maybe the fact that when it's all said and done, we get to relax?
This brings to mind the words of Christ, "It is finished."
Christ felt that stress and probably wanted things to end. He was sent to die for us, and it makes me wonder what He felt like knowing that He would soon give up His spirit after such a grueling battle to the cross. He remained perfect and didn't complain (like we do about our homework and quizzes).
This realization doesn't take away my relief from a semester ended; but it does make me appreciate it. I can't begin to imagine what Christ felt like when he was finished with His task. It makes our seem so small.
Monday, December 13, 2010
First Blog
Here's to starting something new. I've decided to start this for multiple reasons. The main one being that, it seems as though I have all the time in the world to be on the computer, but none what-so-ever to sit down and write. This way I can get my thoughts down, and even let others enjoy them if they please.
I can't say that it'll be an everyday thing...but who knows. I have a lot of random thoughts :)
I can't say that it'll be an everyday thing...but who knows. I have a lot of random thoughts :)
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